Avoiding Fatalities with the Females
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Avoiding Fatalities with the Females
Those little BIG "No-No's" - from the DATING KING

~ Are you one of the many men who continually find themselves stupefied by the sudden "irrational anger" that exudes from your female partner? Just five minutes earlier you were in newly wedded bliss and now, after saying or doing something, though you're not sure just what that something may be, your girlfriend/wife is sulking in a corner or giving you the quiet treatment. Chances are, believe it or no, that you may have done "something", as trivial or small as it may seem. Known for their uncanny observance of details, women take note of everything, from the way the football game dominates our attention as opposed to their latest diatribe on fashion crises, etc. Still, if you want to keep things smooth sailing for a bit, here are a few scenarios to avoid at all cost.

Potentially Perturbed Scenario #1: Call Me Clueless

As opposed to men's more than obvious "cat calls" when women are in the mood for intimacy they aren't nearly as obvious. Still, subtle clues abounding, there's nothing more frustrating for women, arguably, than your repeated clueless-ness to their propositions. Generally being the more sensitive of the two sexes, when a woman sees that her partner isn't quite "getting the hint" she may first suspect that you're simply not interested, rather than clueless. Though her hasty assumptions may be incorrect, still, they're real to her, and potentially disastrous for your relationship. Deft Diffusion: Be on the lookout for things like frequent body contact; be it snuggling, caresses, and unnaturally long kisses. Anything that seems out of the ordinarily affectionate generally is, and with reason: she wants more than just a simple hug. Other surefire clues: skimpier clothing, or seductive outfits, in and out of bed; of course the out of bed thing could also be a surefire sign of something else but for now we'll consider it a call for attention from you, her man, and only you.

Potentially Perturbed Scenario #2: Sloppy-Joe

Sure any woman loves her man in his sweats.on his day off from his 24/7 corporate, suit-attire job. If, however, you're not one of those "white collar" types then, arguably, you not only have the time, but no excuse not to occasionally spruce yourself up, especially for dinner dates or special occasions.

In general women are more concerned with their appearance's effect on not just public opinion, but the opinions of those closest to them. The same ideology goes for their partner; they don't want you wearing a dirty shirt, wrinkled pants, and scuffed shoes to dinner with their parents, or out on a movie date (despite the dark setting).


Though it may seem a bit ridiculous to us, the more "fashionably inept" of the two, in general, still, our appearance holds weighty measure with our female counterparts. To them, clean-shaven means effort, and any type of effort is ALWAYS a good thing. Period. Deft Diffusion: Don't feel pressured to bust out your tux and cummerbund. Stick to basics like a nice pair of khaki chinos and a button-down, short-sleeve, or a crewneck sweater and already you're in the realm of "Brownie Point Lane".

Potentially Perturbed Scenario #3: Bring on the Boy Bash

There's nothing wrong with those ceremonial "guy nights". More importantly, any girl worth keeping around will always respect your need for your steady influx of boy bashes; likewise so should you be more than respectful for her frequent female fiestas and "girls-nights-out". Still, if you manage to keep up until three in the morning with your guys on a frequent basis then you're incessant "snoozes" and "drift-offs" by 9 o'clock on your dates isn't going to sit very well with your woman. In fact, she's going to feel rather dejected; unappreciated, worthless, burdensome, etc. There's no way to make amends for this fatal flaw other than to genuinely feel and display your enthusiasm to also partake in nightly, and daily, escapades with your girl as much as you do with your boys. Deft Diffusion: For brownie points try planning a special dinner, or better yet, cook an at home romantic feast for her the night after your big boy bash: it shows you not only care about her, but that you're genuinely concerned about her feeling appreciated. Those nights out with the guys should only ever appear "second best" to those private times with your girl. If it's real love, those guy nights will ALWAYS only ever be "second best". Still, that doesn't mean you don't look forward to them every now and then.

Potentially Perturbed Scenario #4: Dine and Dash

The dinner scene is a prime setting for romance. That said, no matter where the locale, save for fast food joints, if you're at a sit-down meal, or an at home feast, DO NOT, I repeat, do not rush through your meal like a starving heathen. Not only does it imply that you're anti-romantic but also that you could care less about what the food tastes like, where you're at, etc. In short, it communicates to your partner that you would rather be somewhere else doing something else, with possibly someone else.


Dinner-time is an opportunity for intimacy; to reflect on your day, share your feelings, experiences, memories, etc. If you're constantly stuffing your face, not only do you not have time to talk, but you subconsciously imply that you don't want to engage; innocent or no. Deft Diffusion: Even if you're absolutely starving try waiting for her to begin eating before you shovel your first forkful. It not only shows deferred respect to your partner; it suggests that you care about her enjoying the experience as much as you do. What's more, if she's as hungry as you are, allowing her to begin eating lets her lead the way: If she starts scarfing down then there's nothing for you to fear and you can join right in.

Still, if she begins to pick at her plate and talk away, you've been given the signal, think subtle here, that she's more into "sharing the moment" than the food. Letting her lead the way is generally the best failsafe to know just exactly what type of mood she's in before you accidentally blow it.

Potentially Perturbed Scenario #5: Patronizing Patrick

This may seem counterintuitive, still, women love to "let off steam" but that doesn't mean they want you to take the reins and tell them what they're doing wrong and how to fix it, quite the opposite. Generally these "venting" sessions imply that they are in need of a strong shoulder and an attentive, genuinely attentive, ear. They want you to sympathize. Only offer advice if they implore suggestions, otherwise you may seem patronizing. Deft Diffusion: If your woman comes up crying and venting hysterically simply wrap her in your arms and whisper something sympathetic like, "I'm really sorry, is there anything I can do?" It not only shows that you care but that you're willing to help her as she sees fit, not as you deem correct. It leaves her in control of her own "out-of-control" fiasco, with your standing supportively at her side.


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