LANGUAGE - Flirting.com
How to physically tell if your little flirting
techniques are actually working!
... from the DATING
~Body language is one of the easiest ways to gauge your success,
or lack thereof, with your flirting game. Most of the time people
will send physical cues to let you know whether they are interested
or not. But, so many people refuse to pay attention to the small
details: details that may be saying "go away," or "come a little
closer." Though the science of body language covers much more than
will be discussed, here are a few cues for men to watch out for
when flirting with the women. The following is a list of physical
actions women tend to perform to send a signals that says, "Hey
dummy, ask for my number already."
Her Lips: A big smile with a full set of teeth and a relaxed
face usually indicates sincere content with the situation. A more
aggressive woman may bite her lips, particularly a corner of the lower
lip, or occasionally wet them with her tongue to show interest. Moreover,
a woman who is constantly putting her fingernail in between her teeth
is sending a positive flirting cue to continue with your progress.
Lastly, a woman might try to plump her lips, giving them that "pouty"
look to create a more sexy appeal, another positive sign that she's
Her Hair: The age old trick of playing with the hair is a
way for woman to not only let a man know she's interested, but to
market herself to an entire audience as a flirtatious person. The
twisting, twirling, flicking motions all send signals that she's single
and ready to have fun. When in a private discussion, however, pay
attention if she begins to stroke her hair or pushes it off of her
shoulders to expose her face; both indicate an attempt to quickly
clean up her appearance.
Her Eyes: Having dilated pupils is always a positive sign:
it shows sincere interest. Secondly, the eyebrows are very important.
Women are very expressive through their eyebrows but most men seem
oblivious to what they're trying to say. When you approach a woman,
pay attention to her eyebrows. If they immediately go up (usually
an indicator of surprise) but are followed by steady eye contact and
a smile then you've probably been given the okay to proceed. If she
makes eye contact with you and then winks, she's definitely sending
flirtatious signals to beckon you closer.
Women will also tend to bat their eyelashes by blinking them more often and softening
their gaze to a lovey dovey look when there are interested. If she
seems "gaga-eyed" chances are you're back in the game.
Her Clothing: Pay close attention to what a woman wears, but
don't let it be the main focus of your judgment. Many times younger
woman who are proud of their physique will tend to wear more revealing
clothing. In the long run this can potentially mean nothing for a
suitor, and it is not a good indication that she is "cheap" or provocative.
However, if the clothing tends to be sheer and she lacks any undergarments,
she may be sending signals that she's ready to flirt with a credible
suitor. Furthermore, if you are talking and you notice that her nipples
have suddenly hardened then chances are she is very, very interested
in you, or it could just be cold inside! What's more a woman ready
to get her flirting game on will tend to wear clothing with a higher
hemline, but again this isn't always the case. Instead, try to watch
out for a girl who is constantly patting herself down to smooth out
wrinkles or weathered clothing while talking to you, she's trying
to make herself look better in your presence.
Her Legs: More often than not, if your discussion has moved
from salutations to serious, likewise you have moved from the floor
to a booth or barstool where the two of you can sit down. Pay attention
to her body language while seated, is she facing you, or away to the
crowd? The latter says you might need to work harder or move on, whereas
the former says, "I'm all ears." Furthermore, if she is trying to
maintain an erect posture it's likely she's trying to make a good
impression. Women who tend to slouch have either lower self-esteem
about their bodies, and/or, aren't comfortable with the current situation.
If her legs are open or crossed and pointed in your direction she
is sending you positive signals to continue with your conversation.
If she has crossed her legs and they are down and away from you, perhaps
she is just obliging your request for a conversation.
Her Hands: The position of a woman's hands can also tell a
lot about her opinion of her suitor. If she has faced both hands palms
up, she is probably interested. Moreover, is she has rested the elbow
of one hand into the palm of the other, which is cocked up and facing
palm out, she is sending a signal that she is engaged in the conversation.
Some women will play with either their keys or any nearby instrument
out of nervousness. The key to deciding whether the nervousness is
positive or negative lies in observing how she plays with the item.
If she tends to rub things or stroke them, like the stem of a wine
glass, she is more than likely interested. If she however, is fidgeting
with her keys and has paired the distraction with equally averted
eyes and a fidgety posture, she is probably ready to end the conversation.
Other signs of interest may come from her actions of touching jewelry
around her neck, an earring, or a watch around the wrist; these are
all located around pressure points that are often highly sensitive
and easily aroused. If she is constantly reverting to playing with
these areas she may be subconsciously sending very aggressive signals.
Lastly, a sure fire sign she isn't interested is if when you approach
her, she begins to rummage through her purse or look at her watch.
Her Voice: Watch the intonation (that is, the ups and downs
in both the loudness and the range of her voice). If she tends to
fluctuate repeatedly in both then she is displaying a sincere interest
in the topic of conversation. If however, she remains constantly speaking
at a higher pitch, seems to be simultaneously stiff, and her eyebrows
are raised, she may be feigning interest, but not in a bad way. More
than likely she is trying to seem feminine and attractive and is reverting
to a flirting technique that is the "giddy girl." It's the monotone
voice coupled with the blank stare and frequent pauses before a response
that indicate her mind is probably elsewhere. Also, look for full,
hearty, cavalier laughs; they indicate an abandon of self-consciousness
and a connection to the conversation. However, if her laughs are faint
and giddy she may either be:
b) feigning interest; or
c) attempting to maintain a feminine persona. Another good tip is
to watch for her attempts to match your voice patterns, such as speed
and tone, during conversation: it shows she's listening attentively
and suggests she's interested.
The Little Things: In addition to the aforementioned, it is
also important to always take into consideration a few additional
tips. Does she seem like she is trying to mirror your body position
and posture? This is a positive indicator she is attracted to you
in some way. If she becomes flushed in the skin, namely in her face
but sometimes a flushed blotchiness will spread across a woman's chest,
this is a physical indicator that there is definitely either a physical
connection, or you have just embarrassed her in some way. If she seems
to take lengths to keep herself in eye's view for extended periods
of time, she's probably done so on purpose, which in your case is
a good thing. Lastly, look for incidental body contact, as in light
hand touches, shoulder brushing, etc. Anything that looks like an
excuse to physically catch your attention probably is one. What's
more, unless she has accidentally bumped into you one time, her repeated
interjections are a sure sign that she's looking for you to take notice.
Although it may seem like a lot of information, and it is, just take
your time and slowly try analyzing one or two of the key points the
next time you're practicing your latest flirting technique. In time
you will learn that most signals are interconnected, be they positive
or negative. So be on the lookout for something obvious; generally
more frequent, subtle hints will ensue.
Whoever said the art of dating wasn't a game obviously wasn't the
one doing the dating. But, that doesn't mean you have to be devious
and deceptive. Think of it as honing a trademark: once you've mastered
one or two tricks of the trade, you've simply increased your odds
for success the next time you're looking to book a Saturday night.